What we have to look forward to in 13 years

This weekend I went on our Presbytery’s Middle School Retreat with the youth from my church.  After returning, I feel the need to issue a public service announcement to all pregnant women: sleeping on mattresses made for 50 pound children is not a good idea.  I feel pretty certain that the 2 inch foam “mattress” let me get about 3 hours of sleep over a 2 night retreat and a ridiculously cramped back.  Awesome.  

However, I did get many glimpses into my future while hanging out with a bunch of 13 year olds all weekend, and I am thinking that the baby should just skip middle school all together.  Now don’t get me wrong, I think middle schoolers are great, but there is not enough money in the world that would get me to repeat my middle school years and I really think that the baby should just skip his as well.

Lets face it, middle schoolers are awkward.  They are really just a study in contrasts.  Some of them still look like little kids, some have hit growth spurts and can’t keep up with their new found bodies, and some try way to hard to look older than they are.  

The girls in my cabin got up over and hour before breakfast on Saturday even though none of them were taking showers.  After waking up the whole cabin to the lovely ringtones on the their cell phone alarm clocks, they proceeded to complain about how cold it was in the cabin while simultaneously picking out which tank top they should wear for the day.  Keep in mind, they each bought every tank top they owned on the trip, necessitating the need for a car just full of luggage for a 2 night retreat.  I tried to remind them that we were having a cold snap and it was 40 something degrees outside, but hello, tank tops are much cooler than being warm, so the tank tops won out.  Then the girls proceeded to straighten their hair and put on their makeup in order to impress all the other retreat participants.  Not needing to find a church camp romance (that was so 1996), I put on a long sleeve t-shirt, sweatshirt, and maternity jeans and pulled my hair into a ponytail.  

Who knows what life will be like when this little one gets to be 13, but I hope for his sake, he gets to go on church retreats, and I hope that his poor mother remembers to bring her own mattress next time!



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4 responses to “What we have to look forward to in 13 years

  1. emily morse

    morgan, i feel your pain! i’ve worked and volunteered at a non profit youth summer camp for the last 5 years and i always gladly take the youngest girls! dealing with slow shoe tying and “i can’t find any underwear” is more my speed than boy drama and stilettos at summer camp (yes, that actually happened!)

    i love the middle schoolers, too, though. they usually have open minds about new experiences and interacting with others.

    awe, i can’t wait to see you as a mom!


  2. Rebekah

    I get to take the youth to the Tip of the Iceburg retreat in January. I will spend the next three months looking forward to sleeping on those mattresses while 7 mo. pregnant and hanging with middle schoolers who have to talk about sexuality with church adults. I. can’t. wait.

  3. Who says spending the day with middle schoolers isn’t fun? But I’d never spend the night! That’s what will make you crazy.

  4. Patrick

    Classic! And why I love middle school boys. Outside of tolerating the noxious fumes of boys who pack for retreats without soap, towel, or deodorant (thus why I try to bring 2 spray cans), I always get a hot shower whenever I want and I never worry about them waking me up early. Funny enough–the middle school girls seem to hang out with me more not than back in the day–must be the soap.

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